Blog Posts From 1000 Days Sober
Sometimes, even if you attempt to change, there will always be that immense feeling of relieving oneself of the thirst and resisting the pleasure of having that one drink.
You’ll hear the nagging from several people. You’ll be bothered by it. And you’ll probably think that these people do not want you to succeed. And you might also perceive this as temptation-- but that’s just what it is.
Not a deception. Not an ill-will. Or not even peer pressure. This is you developing a response or feedback in the form of internalised pressure not to give in. This is Resistance.
Socialisation has trained you to unconsciously behave in a certain way to please the people around you as if having an audience.
When you are in a position where many eyes observe and judge you, you will create this little safe space in your head.
It is where you would argue about the decisions you must make that would allow you to fit in your group and somewhat benefit your perception of yourself.
Contrary to the belief that peer pressure is generally influenced by external social forces such as the presence of people around you, it is the pressure placed upon oneself to compensate for low self-esteem, long for validation, and acquire a sense of belongingness.
A Striver reflecting on how pressure works for her at the Thought Phase of The STRIVE Method for Addictions answered, “I have put the most pressure on myself to change, and that has mostly come from the effects my drinking had on other people…”
As much as we all strive for individuality, there will always be that distinct sense of feeling to conform. Nevertheless, commitment to your goal also requires internalised pressure that only you can place upon yourself.